The Great Giveaway

If you had stopped by my office last week you would have seen the conference table spread with a white tablecloth covered with costume jewelry. The photo that accompanies this blog documents what was left after many members of my staff had already taken about half of what was available.

So how did all of that jewelry get there? And why? And perhaps there are a few lessons in this – lessons far more valuable than a few hundred costume bracelets, necklaces, and rings.

The jewelry got there because a close friend of mine brought it to generously give to anyone in my office who wanted it.  She has been on a rampage recently, clearing out all of her closets, storage space, and garage.

I was amazed when I saw such a vast hoard. “That’s a lot of jewelry,” I said.  You must have acquired one or two new items a day for twenty years.”

“Only a few pieces are mine,” she said. “Most belonged to my mother and my aunts. I just hope someone takes it all.”

So what did I learn from this experience that I’d like to share with you?

1. The jewelry was accumulated by several women over their lifetimes. I’m sure each piece had a story, and meant something to them. Now it has no value to them and, apparently, little value to anyone else. Looking at all of that “leftover” jewelry I felt sad. The lesson I take is that the sum total of our habits and preferences is ours alone. When we are gone, our things won’t matter to us anymore – quite possibly they won’t matter to anyone else either.
2. It’s easy to acquire a lot of stuff, but always remember – it is only stuff. Years ago, while traveling in Scotland, I purchased a tea set just before boarding my return flight. When I arrived home I stored it in my closet for five years.  Then I took it to a vacation house I don’t even own anymore.  I seldom drink tea, and I can’t remember what the tea set even looked like or where it is today.  There must be a short circuit in my brain when I buy a material item, because I never consider in advance what will become of this new “treasure.”  Maybe someday they’ll all wind up on someone else’s “give-away” table.
3. Be generous. Give it away as soon as you don’t need it.  As a recent best-selling author suggests, keep only those things which bring you joy.
4. Life’s journey is personal, unique, and temporary. Enjoy each day while you can. Pay attention to all the non-material treasures in your life: your family, your friends, and the time you spend with those you love.

I’m sure you have already learned most of these lessons. The problem is– we tend to forget.  At least, I do.

At the end of each day I review in my mind all of the joyful experiences from that day. This gives me pleasure, and helps me look forward to tomorrow.

And most of my joy does not involve things.

Alan