Take One Deep Breath
I was born in 1940 Los Angeles, a city that earned its reputation as the “smog capital” of the United States. It held that reputation from the 1940’s until the 1970’s.
For thirty years I inhaled air I could almost see, especially when blue skies turned hazy brown, which was often.
A few days ago, after a gentle rain, I began my daily walk around the block. After a few steps the clean air felt so fresh I found myself taking one deep breath. That was new for me.
Suddenly, I realized that for most of my life I’ve been taking shallow breaths, following an unconscious decision I made as a child because I didn’t want dirty air to invade my lungs.
In retrospect, I doubt my shallow breathing helped. After all, I was still immersed in the same polluted air.
But that realization led me to wonder what other unconscious decisions may have guided (or misguided) my life.
Here’s an important one. Many years ago, I unconsciously told myself: “I ‘want to have an interesting life.” Not necessarily a conventional one, or a pain free one. An interesting one.
I may have overdone it.
That single self-fulfilling proposition might explain why I studied, in turn, accounting, law, counseling, and professional writing.
All my life it seems I’ve alternated between town (business and money) and gown (curiosity and learning). During law school I took a nighttime course in Shakespeare. Even today one of my favorite entertainments is to attend a lecture – recently Justin Treaudau, former prime minister of Canada.
At 25 I formed a law partnership. At 28 I founded a commercial real estate company.
I’ve experienced four marriages, one three-year live-in relationship, four divorces, and, today, one fulfilling remarriage. (Smile, Daveen. You’re on Candid Alan.)
I have six children, all of whom still talk to me.
I’ve written three People Tools self-help books, one a New York Ties bestseller, and two Benji children’s books that are still in print.
I’ve founded and still oversee two charitable foundations.
Nore than twenty years ago I started Rattle, a surprisingly successful poetry journal. (Thank you, Tim Green.)
Years ago, I wrote a prescient poem.
Choices
“I decide my life when I do not understand.
“I understand my life in living those decisions.”
It’s been a wild ride, and I intend to continue for as long as I can. And that may be a long time because my father lived to be 104. (Thanks, Dad.)
And since it’s never too late to change an obsolete habit, I’ll continue to take in as many deep breaths as I can.
Alan
P.S. Take one deep breath. Feel better? Please forward my blog to a friend.