When Your Emotional Tank Is Nearly Empty
When I was eighteen I depleted my entire savings to buy my first new car – a metallic blue VW Bug. It was an economy car, lacking amenities such as a fuel gauge.
As I recall, the fuel tank held 12 gallons. When there were only 1-1/2 gallons left the engine would sputter to a stop, which meant I had to turn a black handle near the gas pedal to access the remaining fuel. Every time I turned that handle I vowed to stop at the next gas station. Sometimes, though, portable gas tank in hand, I had to walk.
Many of us, myself included, are feeling that COVID-19 has depleted our emotional fuel tank. There is so much to worry about these days. How can we celebrate the holidays with family? What if everyone isn’t being careful? Will it be warm enough to eat outside?
The biggest difference between my VW running out of gas when I was eighteen, and my emotional tank running low today, is that refueling our hearts is never as simple as refueling a car.
In each situation we have to first be aware that we’re running near empty. I’ve learned to pay attention to my body for emotional cues. Am I feeling low energy? Have I lost interest in activities I usually enjoy?
Next, we need to know what solutions might work best for us. Where is the nearest filling station for your psyche? For each of us the answer will vary.
For me – it might be as near as my mind – giving myself positive messages. I know I always feel better when I tell myself, “You’re going to have a great day,” rather than, “I hope today isn’t as bad as yesterday.”
I also avoid what I call “The Coloring Book Effect.” This means that when I’m in a great mood every color seems bright. But when I’m feeling low everything seems dark — until I’m able to separate the positive emotional wheat from the negative emotional chaff. When this happens, I can remind myself that life is never all good or all bad. It’s a mixture of light and dark.
I also know that I feel better when I’m physically active, so I’ve been walking a lot.
Finally, I find that helping others helps me. I always feel better when I’m caring for someone else.
When you feel depleted I encourage you to find your own way of refueling. Whether it’s baking bread or reading or spending time with family (or your cat), each of us needs to identify those activities that will help us recharge emotionally.
My VW Bug rests somewhere on the scrap heap of history. I now drive a Tesla, and refueling is just one electrical outlet away.
Safe travels, physically and emotionally.
Alan